tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354660152024-03-08T13:08:52.951+11:00What's a keda?Blogging: because I feel I should finish what I've started.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.comBlogger245125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-69526602017106219242017-06-17T15:15:00.002+10:002017-06-17T17:24:42.412+10:00Book review: The Barrier by Shankari ChandranI got around to writing a Goodreads review for Shankari Chandran's new book. I actually really think she's found her groove with this fast paced fun style of writing and I can't wait for the next one. Speaking of writing, I'm going to try and put some thoughts down about what is going on for me at the moment, in terms of parenting, my divorce and also my time on prac (for my nursing studies I'm Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-14025845529107860242017-04-22T12:25:00.000+10:002017-04-22T12:25:22.768+10:00The Barrier by Shankari ChandranThe Barrier by Shankari Chandran
I have read some spoilers for this already and I cannot wait to get my paws on an actual copy! Only another month til it's release! Wheeee!
View all my reviews
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-67548909486657363952017-04-04T21:02:00.000+10:002017-04-04T21:02:14.350+10:00A Letter to a FriendUnusually for nursing school I was at a table with three men (boys?) today. I have had classes with all three and am quite friendly, but one of these young men is someone I count as a really good friend. More than just a contextual 'uni friend' the guy is someone who has said the right thing to me when I was upset, helped me when I wasn't really managing and he's someone I really trust, which is Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-71733331995132773452017-03-12T20:22:00.002+11:002017-03-14T09:23:34.516+11:00Organising ALL THE THINGSI have been falling down internet rabbit holes on organising recently. I'm reading about Project Organize me Entire Life, reading reviews of ring bound vs disk bound day planners and gazing at endless filing systems on Pinterest. I spent about three hours in Officeworks last week. This obsession is sucking my time and I recognise it as something with more complex motivation than just wanting a Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-66568100812843906042017-02-25T14:49:00.001+11:002017-02-26T13:58:00.743+11:00CHICKENS! (from the archive)I picked the chookens up the day after my birthday, so we've had them here for about 10 days and I'm still reasonably besotted.
Chook looking pissed off after
spending 40 mins in a box.
The people we picked them up from (City Chicks in Marsden Park) were just lovely. They showed me how to clip their wings, they let my little boys go exploring in their yard, showed them baby chicks and the Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-68343512887764225132017-02-25T14:47:00.000+11:002017-02-26T13:58:31.588+11:00Back on the blogging wagon (from the archive)It turns out that I'm far less inspired to write now I'm in therapy. I'm not really sure why, but I'm going to give it a try because Sanjay reminded me I won't remember when Kiran's milestones happened if I don't write them down, and I won't write them down if I'm not blogging them so here goes.
At 13.5 months Kiz says plenty of words more-or-less reliably:
Nigh-nigh (goodnight and it comes withAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-35544247991728407472017-02-25T14:44:00.000+11:002017-02-25T14:44:40.398+11:00I'm baaaack (again)Life over the last year has been pretty fraught, but isn't it always? I feel like I just lurch from one crisis to the next. Not that these crises are always terrible, or necessarily negative at all, just times when life requires more than I thought I had to give.
There are tough times for a whole bunch of people - a dear friend had a rather serious breast cancer scare and another close friend's Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-16985692343666085832016-10-28T14:30:00.000+11:002016-10-28T14:30:03.893+11:00Feminism and the performance of femininity: at what cost?Irony can be found anywhere. As I was shaving my legs this morning (!) I was thinking about something two things I saw and 'shared' on FB recently and how they both contradict and support each other in their desire to support feminists (as differentiated from feminism). The first was the ever-inspiring Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie in the form of a letter to a friend on how to raise her daughter Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0Sydney NSW, Australia-33.8688197 151.20929550000005-34.7128017 149.91840200000004 -33.024837700000006 152.50018900000006tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-25415282130681111592016-10-20T11:42:00.001+11:002016-10-20T11:42:24.943+11:00The personal is political, dream life edition.I go through phases where I remember my dreams. They are often really funny, when they aren't tediously anxious (Why aren't I wearing pants? Why did they change the time for that very important thing that I have to go to, so now I can't get there on time? Why does this bathroom not have walls? All variations on a theme - anxiety is really, really boring). Often they feel like they are a message Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-67740983023923720732016-09-12T11:13:00.001+10:002016-09-12T11:13:41.083+10:00The Homework Conundrum
I've been very me-centric here for a while, so let me just very quickly explain what has been happening with school homework here. The boys, year 1 and 4 (ages 7 and 10) have been complaining more and more about homework. They don't have very much to do but it has become a very big issue in our house, with far more time spent arguing and cajoling than actually working. I've done a little bit of Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-41081940785127562502016-09-05T19:26:00.000+10:002016-09-05T19:26:01.082+10:00PTSD from suicidal ideation?....I'd never really thought about that before but it's interesting. I'm not even sure that it's useful, but this article about 'why it's so hard for us to recover from being suicidal' is one of those things that, like it or not, is going to compost in my head and then inform the way I think. What do you think? What about when suicidal ideation becomes a comforting (if terrifying) habit? The Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-20521049120207133172016-08-23T21:59:00.001+10:002016-08-23T21:59:54.106+10:00Lived experienceI've been meaning to write about tattoos, but an assignment I'm doing on the difference between grief, sadness and depression and a lecture I went to this morning have me thinking. The idea of the lecture was to give student nurses an insight into mental illness that we may not otherwise get, a lived experience story from the point of view of a 'consumer' and that of a carer. Jayne Newling came Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-85829945667970804432016-08-04T21:16:00.001+10:002016-08-04T21:16:31.818+10:00More on gardening and emotional distressI am a bit anxious at the moment and my mood has been a bit up and down with normal triggers of uni stress and relationship stress. This means I've been trying extra-hard to fit bits of self-care into the busyness of my days. For exercise I have been trying to walk to the station rather than driving (a solid 15+ minute up-hill walk which is fine if it's not raining and I don't have too much to Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-90540924693774416482016-08-02T20:05:00.000+10:002016-08-02T20:05:36.050+10:00To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow"To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow" is allegedly a quote by Audrey Hepburn. It sounds twee to me, even when I imagine it in her voice, but there is a really interesting current of truth running through it. I was weeding the other day and realised that if there was one thing I would recommend to anyone with what are coyly titled 'mental health challenges' it would be gardening.
I feelAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-61733844651330891112016-03-23T22:14:00.000+11:002016-03-23T22:14:03.830+11:00Tanya asked what an Atheist Hindu was.....and I told her I didn't really know, but I would try and think it through. She asked in the context of me claiming that my Pundit acknowledging 'Atheist Hindu' as a thing. It's something I've been thinking about a bit recently, as I try to make sense of the difficulties I face and when I revel in feeling like I am fulfilling my dharma as I study nursing and raise my kids. I was brought up by a Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-901768253612536912015-12-11T22:47:00.000+11:002015-12-11T22:47:13.967+11:00Nursing Prac - the reflection that I couldn't submit to uniThis prac has been a game changer for me.
I've always been a bit 'nursey' - black humour and can talk about gross things at mealtimes. I have endless relatives in nursing and a few of my friends are nurses but over the last three weeks I feel like I've started my induction into a whole new world. It's not just the stuff people talk about - naked bodies and bad smells, although I guess that's Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-3247588560806621612015-11-09T20:23:00.000+11:002015-11-09T20:23:18.027+11:00Short post: atheism, kids, diwali and my nursing studies I'm kinda joking with that 'short' part, but considering almost all the big life issues are jammed into the post title, and some of them are somewhat contradictory it will be short. You will be pleased to know I don't have anything to say about politics today.
Have I mentioned before about how I sort of consider myself an atheist Hindu (atheist first, Hindu second)? It came about when the wise Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-87201439213904331412015-11-06T13:50:00.002+11:002015-11-06T13:50:34.993+11:00MedicationSo many times people ask me if I shouldn't 'have a rest' from my medication. These are often the same people who suggest people with depression should just remember how good they have it compared with people in Syria/current the international hotspot, or suggest that we harden up (We are the toughest people you will ever meet. We do battle with our own minds). The short answer is 'no' but it's Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-41930424358031363842015-10-20T17:01:00.000+11:002015-10-20T17:01:04.791+11:00Homework
I've had a shitty week. Lots of tears and gritted teeth but a lot better after seeing the compassionate Dr S. He told me I should be writing stuff down more (I think he meant writing good stuff about myself down so I could go back to it in moments of self-loathing) but making notes for myself and diary writing have always had a whiff of make-work about them to me, so I will write here. Also, Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-21663825578815575232015-10-12T09:34:00.001+11:002015-10-13T09:35:47.772+11:00Don't Blame Autistic People, or Mental Illness, For Mass ShootingsDon't Blame Autistic People, or Mental Illness, For Mass Shootings - when I was googling trying to find information on some of MY mental health diagnoses I found a surprising amount of bullshit about how people with mental illness are awful, un-compassionate and destructive. Not good stuff to come across when you are having a mental health crisis. Trust me on this, it's pretty horrible Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-44861702426958641702015-09-28T22:24:00.000+10:002015-09-28T22:27:01.789+10:00Not a JokeQuestion: What did the penis say to the hairdresser?
Answer: Absolutely nothing.
It's the hair on heads we are talking about here, not genital hair, OK, so the presence or absence of a specific set of genitalia has nothing at all to do with haircuts. Right? Are you with me so far? Not too complex really. Here is another not-joke for you:
Customer: Can I have a haircut please?
Hairdresser: Have Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-5193494162832476462015-09-25T21:31:00.000+10:002015-09-25T21:31:03.194+10:00I hate post titles! So awkward. Weirdly, I like emails to have good clear subject lines though. How about 'Therapist visit recap' - will that do?On Wednesday I met with the psychiatrist I had been seeing during my hospital stay. I didn't get any more clarity about the vague hint of a diagnosis he gave me but there were some really good things about the visit.
I was able to be really clear with him about a few things that he'd said to me that I thought were insensitive. I wasn't accusatory, just clear about how I felt. It was difficult Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-17473872794253087762015-09-22T20:02:00.000+10:002015-09-25T21:32:23.316+10:00Post Discharge Follow Up AppointmentI think I'm pretty much well now. Or should that be 'managed'? I see myself as having a chronic illness that's managed but has occasional flare ups. If I'm lucky I can get treatment before the flare ups get too bad. Maybe one day I will be unlucky enough that my illness will kill me. Anyhow, my meds seem to be working pretty well and I'm coping ok with normal stresses, but sometimes, suddenly, Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-7423236993364284522015-09-10T19:23:00.001+10:002015-09-25T21:33:16.402+10:00Group Therapy - R U OK DAY?
**TRIGGER WARNING - discussion of mental illness, anxiety, depression and suicidal thoughts**
For those that don't know, these recent posts have been coming to you from a nice private psychiatric hospital. This came about because after fronting to my psychiatrist appointment and sitting there for my allotted time sobbing about how it was all too much and too rotten, and how it wasn't really and Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35466015.post-75706652139213045572015-08-30T18:47:00.000+10:002015-09-25T21:34:06.278+10:00Mental illness (nope, I don't have mental health at the moment)I've been thinking a lot about ideas around accepting help, asking for help contrasted with autonomy and self-reliance in the context of mental illness. In my own self-critical way I told myself to shut-up and deal with the fact I need help, that to get it I need to ask for it, I don't need to 'prove' I need it and receiving help is difficult and weird but I'm going to have to get used to it. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00946466511134816247noreply@blogger.com0